


Chips on Both of Our Shoulders

by orphan_account



Category: Left Behind - Jerry B. Jenkins & Tim LaHaye, Left Behind: the Kids
Genre: Bad Decisions, Christianity, F/M, Teen Pregnancy, Underage Drinking, Unplanned Pregnancy, rebellious teens accidentally rebel too much
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-19
Updated: 2020-05-24
Packaged: 2021-02-27 06:54:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 12,582
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22322896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Vicki and Judd barely know each other, until they do.They go to the same school. They're forced to go to the same Youth Group. They go to the same party, one fateful winter night.That night, without realizing it, they tie their lives together irreversibly.Vicki and Judd barely know each other, until they have to.
Relationships: Judd Thompson Jr. & parents, Judd Thompson Jr./Vicki Byrne, Vicki Byrne & parents
Comments: 30
Kudos: 5





	1. Too Young For This

**Author's Note:**

  * For [myglassesaredirty](https://archiveofourown.org/users/myglassesaredirty/gifts).



Vicki sits on the porch of the fellowship hall, leaning against the railing. It’s raining, which means her dad will be even later than usual, likely cursing out the old sedan despite his recent efforts to ‘turn over a new leaf’. _And he says I have too dirty of a mouth._

She thinks all of the other kids in her youth group have gone home, but the door swings open one more time, releasing not her youth pastor but a boy she thinks is named Judd.

“Hey,” he says casually, sitting next to her. “My mom isn’t gonna be here for a bit longer; she’s stuck in traffic, ‘cause of the storm. Can I sit here?”

Vicki shrugs. “Sure.”

“I’m Judd,” he says, after a moment of silence.

Vicki twists a strand of red hair between her fingers. “I know.”

She knows a lot about him, even if they only know each other through youth group and school. She knows he’s kind, and smart, wise beyond his years, some might say. She knows he keeps his friends from picking on the other trailer park kids, herself included. She doesn’t know if he knows she’s from the park. She doesn’t exactly want to discuss it, doesn’t want to feel her cheeks heating with mostly-unwarranted shame.

“Yeah, of course,” he says, almost laughing. “I mean, it’s not like we spend half of each meeting doing icebreakers or anything.”

Vicki laughs in spite of herself. “Well, I’m Vicki, if you hadn’t caught that already.”

Judd grins, and for the first time, she notices that it’s a little lopsided. “Nice to meet you,” he says, holding out a hand for a handshake.

Vicki is a little surprised. Most of the guys she’s hanging around don’t care about introductions, much less handshakes. Still, she takes his hand and gives her a smile of her own.

“It’s nice to meet you, too.”

\---

Vicki leans against the wall, bored with the senior party already. She’d been invited by a guy who’s already making out with another girl, and while that doesn’t bother her, an hour and half of grinding on guys she doesn’t know has finally gotten boring. Passively watching the party, she sips at her vodka seltzer. It’s her second, and she’s already feeling the buzz.

“Hey,” says a voice by her ear, making her jump. “Hey, Vicki,” it slurs. “What’re you doin’ here? Aren’t you too young for drinking an’ shit?”

Realizing it’s just Judd, Vicki snorts. “Judd, last I checked, you’re not 21 either.”

“You’re a freshman, though,” he mumbles, looking absolutely baffled. “Too young for this shit.”

Vicki tilts her head, contemplating the sixteen-year-old in front of her. He seems like he actually cares, about her, and about her well-being. Except for maybe her older brother, she doesn’t have anyone who really cares about her. It’s a new sensation, and since she’s used to looking out for herself, she’s not sure how she feels about it.

Looking at him longer, she gets an idea. Vicki smiles as she leans back into him, turning her head to keep his gaze but making sure she puts her ass in his crotch. “You know, I do a lot of stuff I’m too young for.”

Judd swallows. Emboldened by alcohol, Vicki takes the opportunity to lick at his adam’s apple. For a moment, they just stare at each other. The next thing Vicki knows, she’s being kissed passionately against the wall.

The makeout session is good. Like, really good. Even an hour of getting sweaty with reasonably attractive boys hadn’t gotten Vicki this worked up. After maybe ten minutes, she pulls out of the kiss, but wraps her arms around Judd’s neck. “You know, there has to be a bedroom here somewhere…”

Judd is ready and willing, and they’re close enough to sober to not trip going upstairs. Once the bedroom door is shut behind them, Vicki doesn’t waste any time pulling her shirt off.

“I know I’m not the first person you’ve done this with,” Judd says, as she’s tugging at his t-shirt. While it’s over his face, Vicki kisses the outline of his mouth.

“Not even close.”

Once they’re down to their underwear, they lie back on the bed, Judd peppering kisses down Vicki’s neck. “Are you sure you want to?”

Vicki moans happily, grinding her hips up into his. “Oh, god, yes.”

\---

Shivering in the January breeze, Vicki practically drags her feet as she walks up the sidewalk into town. Well, not town proper, but close enough. The street she’s on holds a shady bar and a dingy restaurant and a pharmacy that has basically the bare minimum.

The pharmacy is Vicki’s goal for today, to her dismay. She really doesn’t want to be right about why she’s been feeling so tired lately, so sick. Still she has to know. Taking a deep breath, she pulls open the squeaky door. The unoiled hinges are even louder than the ding of the bell.

She knows right where the pregnancy tests are. They’re in the same aisle as the pads and tampons. The aisle is labeled ‘feminine care’, and holds sanitary equipment, pregnancy tests, and condoms. Vicki has only ever shopped for two of those three, but today, it looks like she’s checking the third box as well.

There are too many options. It’s dumb. _Who cares about if the readout is digital or not? Why are there five different brands that do the same thing?_ Vicki grabs the cheapest one and heads up to the counter. She blushes in spite of herself, and mentally curses her red-headed complexion.

The young woman behind the counter, who might have graduated last year or the year before, regards her with sad eyes. “Good luck,” she murmurs, shaking her head. Behind the counter, Vicki can see a little girl playing with a stuffed animal.

She swallows hard. “Thanks.”

On the way home, she walks faster. For one thing, she wants to get home, wants to find out once and for all, wants to use and dispose of the pregnancy test that feels like it’s burning a hole in its plastic bag. For another, it’s getting dark, and the wind has picked up. Walking faster warms her, if only a little.

By the time she gets home, all of the lights are out, and her parents’ door is closed. Careful not to make noise, Vicki makes it to the bathroom and locks the door behind her. She should be alright, as long as she’s not too loud.

The instructions on the pregnancy test are simple enough. She does have to pee, so that part is easy. The waiting is what kills her.

Vicki sets the test on the sink and sits down on the closed toilet lid. Her knees almost hit the sink. Trying to take deep breaths, she buries her face in her hands and squeezes her eyes shut. Thankfully, she holds it together for the three minutes until her timer goes off.

Vicki stands to look at the test, knowing that if she picks it up, she’ll drop it. She stops her hands from shaking by gripping the edge of the sink.

It’s positive.

“Fuck,” she whisper-screams, still not wanting to wake up her parents. “Fuck fuck, fucking fuck!”

Vicki has no clue what to do next. She’s not even sure who the father is. But she doesn’t have money for an abortion, and her newly-Christian parents will never pay for one. She’s stuck like this for the next nine months, and then she’s stuck with a kid.

She likes kids fine, but it doesn’t mean she wants them for herself. She’s fourteen!

“I am _not_ doing this tonight,” she hisses, glaring at the plastic stick. She picks it up, snaps it in half, opens the window, and chucks it into the dirt below. “Fuck you.”

Worried, distressed, and pissed at herself, Vicki stalks off down the hall to bed.


	2. Cut Me Open

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vicki might have sex a lot, but she's normally very careful about it. There's really only one possibility for who the father is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> got home sooner than anticipated from church yeet

Judd always eats his lunch with Lionel, at a round table in the muddy courtyard. Sometimes their other friends join them, but today, that’s not the case. Judd is listening to Lionel grumble about an English project and enjoying his turkey sandwich when a familiar but unexpected face shows up.

“Hi. Judd, right?” Vicki asks, not seeming to notice that she’s interrupting.

“Yeah, hey, Vicki,” he answers. He doesn’t know what to make of her sudden appearance; she’s never sought him out at school before. He really only sees her at youth group, which has only happened twice since the night of the party.

“Um, can I talk to you?”

“Sure,” Judd says, his brows knitting. “Is… something wrong?”

“Um.” Vicki chews her lip. “Uh, can you just-- can we--” she shifts her weight from foot to foot, and jerks her head toward the path out of the courtyard. “Can we talk?”

Judd is worried now. Vicki is stuttering and uncertain, which isn’t like her. Quiet and surly, maybe, but not like this. A pit grows in his stomach, and he nods, dropping his sandwich into his lunchbox. “Alright, yeah.” Ignoring the weird look he gets from Lionel, he follows Vicki out to the dying garden that faces the soccer field.

“Vicki?” he asks, when she stares at him for a few moments without speaking. “What’s wrong?”

She smacks her lips and tucks her hair behind her ears. “Um… do you remember Eisman’s party?”

Judd winces at the blurred memory of his drunken decision. _Oh, god, what was I thinking?_ He thinks, as he’s done many times in the two months since the party. _She’s two years younger than me. She’s fourteen! She should be just learning about dating, not having drunk sex at a house party._ Yes, he knows Vicki has done more than dating with a lot of guys who aren’t him, but that doesn’t mean she deserves any less than the same respect he’d give another girl.

“Yeah, I do,” he finally answers. “Look, Vicki, I’m really sorry, I was drunk, and I know that’s no excuse but I’m really sorry for how I--”

“I’m pregnant,” she interrupts suddenly. 

Judd stares at her, the words not registering. “Wh-what?”

“I’m pregnant,” Vicki repeats, looking even paler than usual. “I, uh, just thought you should know, because-- ‘cause you’re the father, and you have no reason to believe that, so if you don’t I don’t blame you, but I-- I’m normally really good at using protection, and you’re the only guy I haven’t used it with in the last--”

“Vicki.” Judd interrupts this time, holding a hand out to stop her rambling. “I believe you. And I-- I’m sorry.”

“Don’t…” she shakes her head, looking down. “Don’t, Judd. It’s my mistake as much as yours. And you don’t have to be… involved, if you don’t want too--”

“Of course I will!” Judd protests, scowling. “Vicki, I’m not just gonna leave you high and dry. What kind of guy do you think I am?”

Vicki folds her arms over her chest. “How the hell would I know? We barely know each other. All I know about you is that you’re decently nice and way too good at interpreting the Bible.”

Judd scrubs a hand over his face. “God… I’m so sorry, Vicki. How can I help? What are you going to do?” He assumes she’ll get an abortion, and though a part of him objects to that, he knows it’s not up to him. She’s the one who will bear most of this burden, after all, and why would she want a child this soon?

“I can’t afford an abortion,” Vicki mutters, and Judd sees her blush. “My parents definitely won’t pay for it. I guess… I guess I could adopt it out, or something. I dunno. I’m trying not to think about it… maybe that’s not the best course of action.”

“Well, I’m-- I’m here for you,” Judd declares, trying to sound confident and brave. He feels like he could shake apart at any moment, but he doesn’t think it really shows. “I’ll support you, whatever you do. Just… just let me know what you need.”

Vicki shrugs, not looking him in the eye. “Thanks. I, uh, haven’t told my parents yet, and I’m pretty sure they won’t take it well. But, um, I guess we can talk more about this later.”

Judd nods slowly, still waiting for what she’s telling him to sink in. _Vicki is pregnant. With my baby. She’s going to have my baby._ “Um, good luck,” he offers. “With your parents and stuff. Do you… do you want my phone number?”

“Yeah, sure.” Vicki pulls out her phone, and he notices that the screen is badly cracked. She hits a few buttons, then glances up. “What’s your number?”

After they get each other’s contacts, Vicki gives him and awkward wave and walks away. Judd, feeling rather numb, heads back to his lunch table.

Lionel gives him a weird look. “What was that about?”

“Uh…” Judd has no clue how to respond to that. “Um, nothing”

Lionel snorts. “Yeah, right.”

\---

Rolling over for the eleventh time in five minutes, Judd scowls at his clock. It’s 1:48 am, meaning he’s been tossing and turning for over three hours trying to get to sleep. It’s never going to happen, at least, not tonight. 

Every time he closes his eyes, he hears Vicki’s voice in his head, sees her fidgeting and shaking in the courtyard. _God, she’s gotta be scared out of her mind,_ Judd thinks. When she’d told him, she had been quiet and a bit closed off, only meeting his eyes once or twice. But when she had looked at him… when she looked at him, he’d seen fear in her eyes, lighting them up with the urge to flee, the urge to remove herself from the danger. _How am I supposed to live with doing that to her? God, what was I thinking?_ If he’d felt bad about sleeping with a fourteen-year-old before, it’s nothing compared to how he feels now.

He has no clue what to do. The promises he’s made feel empty. How can he help Vicki when he’s only ever had a couple of casual girlfriends? He’s not ready to be a father, but at the same time, he wants so desperately to do right by his kid.

What is he going to do? What are either of them going to do?


	3. Next Step

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vicki knows her next step has to be telling her parents.

Vicki knows her next step has to be telling her parents. If she really is going to keep this baby, voluntarily or otherwise, she’ll need doctor’s appointments and the like. Just because she doesn’t want a kid doesn’t mean she’s going to be a shitty mom. No, she knows too well the other end of that to ever do it to her child.

Still, she procrastinates for three days after she tells Judd. On one of those, she skips school, trying to avoid everyone and get a handle on herself. Even when she does go to school, she’s careful not to cross paths with Judd. Finally, after dinner one night, Vicki decides it’s time to rip the band-aid off.

Her parents are both on the couch when she approaches, her mother reading one of her new collection of C.S. Lewis, and her father watching basketball. They’re both drinking coffee, a replacement for years of wine and whiskey. Still, at least they seem to be in good moods.

“Hey, um, Mom? Dad?” Vicki tries not to fidget as she sits on the ottoman, at least glad her sister is in bed. “Can I talk to you?”

“You can always talk to us, honey,” her mom says, giving her a small smile. “What’s going on?”

“Well, uh…” Vicki swallows hard, not sure quite what to say. _Just rip the band-aid off._ “Um, I’m pregnant.”

Her parents both stare at her, shock spreading over their faces. Her father chokes on his coffee, while her mother gasps softly, going so ashen that Vicki briefly worries she might faint.

“Victoria, how?” her mom asks. “You’re not-- you’re fourteen! Surely you haven’t been having…” her voice lowers to a whisper. “...sex?”

Vicki would laugh if she weren’t so nervous and terrified. “Yeah, I have,” she mutters, folding her arms over her chest. “For a while. Guess you didn’t notice.”

Finally, her father speaks up. “Young lady, don’t take that tone with your mother,” he reprimands. “You’re the one in trouble here.”

“Tom, she is right,” her mother says, laying a hand on her dad’s arm. “We should have been paying more attention. You’re still in trouble,” she assures Vicki, “but we must have… we must have done something to make you think it was okay to behave like this.”

_Yeah, something like have Eddie when you were barely out of high school,_ she thinks. 

“Dawn, she’s smarter than this!” her father argues. “If she thinks it’s a good idea to… to have sex before marriage, well, she can find out what it’s like to raise a child on her own.”

“But isn’t it our… isn’t it our duty to help her? She’s our daughter, Tom. We have to take care of her, and love her, even if she makes bad decisions.”

“Alright,” he grumbles. “You’re right about that. But just because we’ll let her stay under our roof don’t mean she’s outta trouble.”

Dawn nods. “You’re grounded, Victoria,” she says. “Only school and Youth Group for the next month.”

“And after that, you get a job,” her dad adds. “You’re going to be taking care of this kid. We’ll keep taking care of you, because it’s the good Christian thing to do, but you can’t just sit back and relax.”

Vicki’s not too fussed by her punishments, really, she’s just thankful they’ve stopped talking like she’s not in the room. After days of worrying over how they would react, if she would even have a home once she told them, grounding is a mercy. And a job… well, as much as she hates to admit it, it’s a good idea. If she starts working now, she’ll be able to buy some necessities in a few months. Maybe she’ll be able to give her baby a crib that wasn’t Jeannie’s, and some nice summer clothes-- nine months from the Winter Break party is August, after all.

After another few moments of daydreaming about her baby, Vicki shakes herself. _Woah, woah, woah. One thing at a time._ “Alright,” she says to her parents. “I’ll get a job.”

“And you’re grounded,” her mom reminds her.

“Yes, ma’am.”

“I think we deserve some thanks,” her father adds. “We could’ve kicked you out of here, you know.”

“Thanks,” Vicki mumbles. “Uh, I’m tired. Do you guys need to say anything else, or can I go to bed.”

Her mother’s lips press into a thin line. “Well, you should get some rest,” she sighs. “Tomorrow morning we can talk about going to a doctor. And maybe think on where you’d like to work instead of counting sheep.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Vicki says again. “Goodnight.”

She turns and heads for the room she shares with her sister before they’ve even said it back.

\---

A week after telling her parents, Vicki still hasn’t found a job. She’s still avoiding Judd, too, and her grounding means that all she really does is look through the classifieds and try not to get pulled into conversations with her parents. They don’t seem to know what to do with her, either, so there’s not much of an issue there.

Scrolling through local job listings on her phone, Vicki groans. There’s nothing long-term, or if there is, the lister wants someone 16 or older. _Look, I know I’m not gonna end up somewhere I’ll make a career out of,_ she thinks, _but there’s gotta be some decent job around here! I’m not exactly picky!_

“What’s wrong?” Jeannie asks, drawing Vicki from her thoughts.

Vicki sighs. “I’m looking for a job.”

“Wanna trade?” Jeannie sets down her pencil and pushes her paper forward. “You can do my poetry analysis and I’ll find a cool job for you.”

Although her first reaction is to snort, Vicki finds herself grabbing the paper and handing her phone across the table. “You know what? Sure. Just don’t sign me up for anything without showing it to me.”

The poem is by Robert Frost, and Vicki can distinctly remember reading it in her own 6th grade english class. It’s pretty good, or at least, better than some of the things she remembers from that class. She annotates it in under ten minutes and hands it back to her sister. “Find anything for me yet?”

“I think so!” Jeannie holds out the phone with a bright grin. “Here. These people want someone to help in their store.”

Vicki isn’t expecting much, but to her surprise, the listing looks kind of cool. It’s asking for a high schooler to help out in a thrift shop-- some work behind the counter, some work in shelving, pretty much whatever the owner needs help with. It’s a family business, the side note explains, but the owner’s granddaughter, who had used to do all of this, has gone off to college.

_Good for her,_ Vicki thinks. _Even better for me._

“Thanks, Jeannie!” she says, giving her sister a bright smile. “Let’s see... hm, they only want in-person interviews.” She checks her watch. “They closed at five, but I can’t go tomorrow, I’ve got an appointment…”

“Appointment for what?” Jeannie asks curiously.

Vicki is _so_ not ready to explain to her little sister that she’s pregnant. “Just a doctor’s appointment,” she mutters, her hand slipping down to her stomach. Thankfully, this appeases the eleven-year-old. “It just means I’ll have to spend my Friday afternoon interviewing for a job.”

“Honey, you have Youth Group on Friday,” her mother reminds her, entering the small dining room. “Goodness knows I’m not letting you skip it _now.”_

They’ve never let her skip, but Vicki doesn’t choose to argue that point. “C’mon, Mom, you want me to get a job,” she complains. “Can’t I skip it just this once? There’ll be another one in two weeks.”

(Really, she could do the interview on Saturday, it’s not that big a deal. But Youth Group, unlike school, doesn’t have places to hide or hallways to flee down or any other way to escape dealing with Judd.)

“You’re going to Youth Group, young lady, and that is final,” says Dawn. “Now, let me see that.” She takes Vicki’s phone out of her hand, and for a moment, Vicki actually thinks she’s going to veto the option. After all, it looks like a pretty good deal-- sixteen dollars an hour, somehow, and an interesting workspace. Vicki might end up liking it, which means her mother almost certainly will not. But after a minute or so of scrolling, Dawn’s only words are “well, that looks nice.”

“She’s open Saturdays,” Vicki offers. “I guess I can go then.”

Dawn nods, giving her daughter a smile that might be close to satisfied. “That sounds like a plan.”


	4. Chapter Four

Thursday afternoon, Vicki has her first doctor’s appointment. Judd is the only guy she’s slept with without protection in months, so she can’t be any further than six or seven weeks along, but still, she notices that her winter coat is already stretching to zip over her stomach. God, it would be just her luck, to start showing so early that the whole school figures it out before she even knows the gender.

Her family can’t afford an official OB/GYN, but there’s a women’s care clinic less than a twenty minute drive away. Vicki sits in the passenger seat in silence, cranking up the heat and ignoring how her mother keeps glancing over at her. When they actually get to the clinic, the fifteen minutes in the waiting room are just as awkward.

“I gotta pee,” Vicki finally mutters, standing up and heading for the bathroom before her mom can object. When she returns, Dawn is standing with an older woman in a lab coat, talking in hushed tones.

“You must be Victoria,” says the woman Vicki assumes is a doctor. “Follow me back to the exam room and we’ll get started.”

Vicki only nods, following her mom and the doctor down the hall. When they reach a small room near the end of it, the doctor gestures for her to sit on the exam table.

“Victoria, I’m Doctor Martin,” says the doctor. “I’m going to start by asking you a few questions. Would you like your mother to leave the room?”

Dawn looks offended at the very suggestion. “Of course not! I’m staying!”

“Yes,” VIcki tells the doctor. There’s some arguing, but within the minute, she and Dr. Martin are alone.

“So, Victoria--”

“Vicki.”

Dr, Martin nods. “Vicki. Are you sexually active?”

She bites back a sarcastic retort, laying a hand on her stomach. She thinks it feels different, but that must be her imagination. “Yes.”

“And when was your last period?”

Vicki shrugs. “November.”

“Have you taken the at-home urine test?”

“Yeah. It was positive.”

“Alright. Well, to make sure it wasn’t a false positive, we’re going to do a quick blood test that will tell us if you’re pregnant, and if there’s any immediate health concerns not in your charts. Sound good?”

Vicki nods. “Yeah, thanks.” She holds out her arm, and Dr. Martin draws blood. It doesn’t hurt, but Vicki looks away, her stomach turned by the sight of the needle sliding into her skin.

When the doctor leaves, Vicki’s mom comes back. “Sweetheart, why didn’t you want me in there? You know you can tell me anything.”

“No, I can’t,” Vicki says flatly. Then, she folds her arms over her chest and stares stonily at the wall. Neither her nor her mom say a word until Dr. Martin returns.

“You are pregnant, Vicki,” she says, ignoring the tense atmosphere in the room. “Your hormone levels are very high, and you’re a little anemic. We can give you prenatal vitamins, and a prescription for iron supplements as well.”

“Thank you,” says Dawn, with that small, tight smile that means she’s not sure she can pay for something but doesn’t want to say so. “We’ll see how much our insurance covers.”

Dr. Martin’s nod tells Vicki she sees through the facade. “Our clinic is allowed to give vitamins and the like for free, since they’re directly related to obstetric health, but unfortunately, we can’t do the same for other prescriptions. Here, this is the same drug, but not the big brand name. Hopefully that will help you out.” She scribbles a note on the prescription. “I’ll call this in and you should be able to pick it up tonight.”

“Thank you,” Vicki says. Her mother seconds the sentiment.

“Well, Vicki, I’m not sure you’re far enough along for us to get anything useful from an ultrasound; we don’t really like to do those before ten weeks. Why don’t you come with me to measure your height and weight and blood pressure, and your mother can head up front to schedule your next appointment?”

Vicki nods and follows Dr. Martin out of the room. Within ten minutes, she’s back in the car with her mom.

“Well,” says Dawn, her fingers nervously drumming the wheel, “that went well.”

“Yeah,” Vicki mutters. 

With that, the conversation dies.

\---

Vicki is really, really nervous about seeing Judd at Youth Group. She can barely even admit that to herself, but even thinking about him makes her want to curl into a ball and never come out. Her biggest t-shirts are already close to not fitting over her stomach. Will he notice? She’ll wear a sweatshirt, of course, but if he’s looking…

And he’s said he’ll be there for her, but will he? Vicki has grown used to people breaking promises, leaving, ignoring her. She’s almost certain he’ll do the same. Really, part of the reason she’s been avoiding him over the past week is to not give him any chance to revoke his earlier words.

That has to change tonight.

At five pm, her mom drops her off by the fellowship house, reminding her that her dad will pick her up. She casts a disapproving look at the front of Vicki’s sweatshirt, but must decide it doesn’t give away her secret, because she drives off without another word.

Vicki takes a deep breath and steps through the door, wandering toward the kitchen, where she will find chips and lemonade… and probably Judd. They tend to stand together in the corner before the full group assembles, not usually speaking but comfortable in their discomfort, in their disbelief in the church. Vicki has seen too much bad to believe what she’s taught here.

She’s never asked Judd what he believes. If he believes.

Somehow, she doesn’t think that will be the conversation for tonight.

Sure enough, Judd is standing right in their normal corner when she walks in. “Vicki,” he says, before she’s even picked up her lemonade. “Uh, hi.”

She tries for a half-smile. “Hey.”

“How are you, uh, doing?”

Vicki shrugs, looking around to make sure nobody is listening. They’re the first ones here, and their youth pastor is in his office, visible through the door but paying them no attention. “Um, good, I guess. My parents didn’t kick me out.” She looks at the floor, at her scuffed converse and his nice sneakers. They’re not Nike or any brand she recognizes, but they’re brightly colored, with jagged lines that suggest mountains patterning the sides.

“I haven’t told my parents yet,” Judd admits, keeping his voice low. “I wasn’t sure if it was okay. I didn’t want to tell them before your family knew.”

Vicki blinks. Of all the reasons for him to hide it, that’s not one she had expected. “Oh. Thank you.”

“No problem,” he mutters, rubbing a hand over the back of his neck. “So, are you… feeling okay? How are you doing?”

She’s dangerously close to believing he actually does care about her. “Well, the doctor says I’m a bit anemic, but I’m getting pills for that. Nothing wrong with the…” she slides a hand into her own sweatshirt pocket, rubbing her stomach. “...baby.”

“That;s good,” Judd says, and from the way his face lights up, Vicki can almost believe he intends to keep his promises. “That’s really good.”

“I’ll keep you updated, if you want…” she looks back down at the floor again, not wanting to face the vulnerability of eye contact.

“I’d like that,” Judd says, his voice hushed. “If it’s not too much trouble. And I think I’ll, uh, tell my parents tonight.”

Vicki looks up at him, squinting as she tries to decipher the look in his eyes. She can’t quite get it, and that makes her uncomfortable. She looks away again. “Good luck.”

Judd snorts. “Yeah. I’ll need it.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Judd has procrastinated long enough. It's time to tell his parents.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> who else on a coronacation right now? gonna have so much time to write.... that said, hope everybody's friends and family are safe and healthy.
> 
> ~~I say this like anyone other than Claire reads this fic~~

Now that he has Vicki’s go-ahead, Judd knows he has to tell his parents. It’s been two weeks since Vicki had broken the news to him, and his mom has even said something about him being quieter than usual. He decides to tell them Sunday afternoon.

That morning, he gets up and gets ready early, already donning a sport coat when his mom comes in to drag him out of bed and to church. “Oh,” she says, smiling. “You’re already ready.” She sounds pleased, and although Judd has his issues with the church, it is nice to have a morning where his parents don’t find fault with everything he’s doing.

Church goes as well as it ever does, though Judd sits through the service with a pit in his stomach. Once he gets home, he spends a half an hour trying to start his homework, with no real success. Groaning aloud, Judd finally gives in and trudges down the stairs and into the den.

“Hey, Dad,” he says, finding his father watching golf on the television. “Where’s Mom? I, uh, kinda need to talk to you guys.”

“She’s getting dinner started, son,” he says. “Don’t bother her.”

Judd really, _really_ doesn’t want to have this conversation twice. “Um, it’s kind of important.”

Judd Sr. shrugs. “Then go see if you can help her; she’ll be done faster.”

When he thinks about trying to get his parents in a good mood, that’s a really good idea. “Okay, yeah, I’ll do that.” With a quick nod, Judd rushes off to the kitchen. Fifteen minutes of measuring spices and washing produce later, he’s back in the den, with both parents seated on the couch. They look almost as anxious as he feels.

“What’s the matter, honey?” his mom asks. “Are you going to tell us why you’ve been so high-strung for the past few weeks? We’re worried about you.”

_Damn, am I that obvious?_ Judd scrubs a hand over his neck. “Yeah, I guess this is stressing me out…” he takes a deep breath. “So, uh, do you remember when I was grounded for two weeks last month, after I snuck out to go to that winter break party?”

“Surprisingly enough,” says his dad, voice full of sarcasm, “we haven’t quite forgotten that one yet.”

His mother’s lips press into a thin line. “Judd, have you gotten yourself into trouble again?”

_Man, you have no idea._ Judd takes a deep breath and forces himself to look up at them. “Um, well, I… I, uh…” he swallows hard. “At that party, I met a girl, I mean, I knew her already, from Youth Group, but at the party, we uh… well, um, she’s pregnant.”

Immediately, his dad’s face goes dark, his expression stormy. His mom only stares at him, her jaw dropping, but she is the first to speak. “Judd Thompson! We’ve raised you better than this!”

Judd only nods, bracing for the onslaught of yelling he knows is coming.

“Son, I knew you were irresponsible, but I thought these years were just the good Lord testing my love and faith,” Judd sr. adds. “This is a hell of a test.”

Judd’s hands ball into fists. Of course his parents would make this about god and faith. “I didn’t mean to,” he mumbles, hating how stupid and childish it sounds. “I’m sorry. I’m going to help her out.”

His parents exchange glances, then nod. “It’s the right thing to do,” says Christine. “Do right by your girl, Judd.”

His father frowns. “Why haven’t we met this girl yet? You said she was from Youth Group? Have you ever been on a date, or was she a moment of lust and bad decisions?”

Judd swallows bile at his father’s description. “Dad, I-- she and I-- we’re not, we’re not _dating,_ but, I mean…”

What hurts him more than any of his parents’ chiding is the realization that his dad is right. He had done this to Vicki in an hour, a drunken, passionate hour during which he just couldn’t control himself. Judd sighs and drops his head into his hands. “I’m sorry.”

His parents are both frowning thunderously. “So are we,” his mother says. “You have to be punished for this, Judd. This is-- I can’t believe this. Honey? Do you have any suggestions?”

“Grounding,” Judd Sr. grunts. “No phone or tv for a month, and laptop only for school. Only go to school and Youth Group, and you can’t have anyone over.”

“No driving privileges, either,” his mother adds. “You’ll take the bus to and from school.”

“And I think you should go to church every week, not just Youth Group every other one,” decides his father. “Maybe Father Thomas can drum some decency into your head better than us.”

Judd has to swallow around a sudden lump of rage in his throat, but it only adds to the rock in his stomach. “Yes, sir.”

Judd sr. nods. “Anything else, Christine?”

“Well, I certainly think you should apologize to this nice girl and her family,” she says. “You _do_ know her last name, yes?”

“Yeah,” he mutters. “Byrne. Vicki Byrne.”

“Oh, I know her parents,” Christine says. She doesn’t speak on her opinion of them, but the slight, distasteful downturn of her lips says everything. Judd has to bite the inside of his cheek to keep himself from an outburst.

“We should have a chat with them ourselves,” Judd Sr. grumbles.

Christine nods. “I think _we_ need to have a conversation amongst ourselves, too.” She stands, moving toward Judd and running her fingers through his hair. “Judd, maybe you should head upstairs.” She tilts his head up to look him in the eyes. “Do you have any homework?”

“Yeah,” he mumbles. “I guess I’ll go… do that.”

He doesn’t.

He’s already in so much trouble that a little more won’t make anything worse. Instead of opening his textbook, he grabs his phone, and texts Vicki. _Hey,_ he types. _it’s Judd_

**Hey. What’s up?**

_I told my parents_

**shit. Are you good?**

_I should be asking you that, but yeah_

_my parents want to meet your parents and talk_

**oh. That’s fun**

_Would u rather it be at your place or ours? IDK how much say i have but if youre more comfortable at your house that works for me_

**My folks won’t like me having ppl over**

_Then i guess ill see u at mine sometime this week…_

**See you then.**

Judd stares at his phone until the twins come banging on his door to play with them. Vicki doesn’t say anything else, but the little gray bubble seems like a promise.

_See you then._


	6. Bump in the Road

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vicki and Judd attend an ultrasound appointment (but other stuff happens first)

For someone who’s supposed to be taking it easy, Vicki is under a lot of stress. From the disapproving looks her parents give her nearly 24/7, though, she’s not sure ‘it’s bad for the baby’ will get her out of anything just yet.

Apparently, the Thompsons are already part of Dawn’s Wednesday night get-togethers, the ones that had influenced her parents to become “good Christians”. They already know each other, and it’s quickly arranged that on Tuesday night, the Thompsons will have the Byrnes over for dinner.

As if that weren’t enough, her next doctor’s appointment, when she’ll be ten weeks along, is on Thursday. So yeah, Vicki is gonna have a stressful week.

“Victoria, are you sure that’s what you want to wear to the Thompsons’?” her mother asks, critically eyeing Vicki’s worn dress. It comes to just above her knees and has three-quarter sleeves, so it should be acceptable. She’d picked it because it was loose-fitting and soft, but it doesn’t seem to be enough of the former for her mother.

“Mom, it’s not like they don’t know I’m--”

Dawn shushes her sharply, pointing to Jeannie’s open door. Once again, Vicki rolls her eyes. It’s not like they can hide this from her sister forever.

“Come on, what’s the point of hiding it from them?” In truth, Vicki’s jeans are getting uncomfortable, and she doesn’t have so little pride that she’ll wear sweats or leggings to a dinner. “If I wasn’t--” she bites her tongue-- _”you know,_ we wouldn’t be having this dinner.”

Her mother sighs. “Alright, fine. But put leggings underneath that, it’s too short.”

“Is not!”

“Victoria Byrne, do not talk back to me!”

“Why bother, Dawn?” Vicki’s dad comes on the scene wearing jeans and a button-down, so she’s not the only one dressed up. “She’s already a tramp, it shouldn’t matter if she dresses like one.”

Vicki flinches, her cheeks burning with embarrassment, and anger at her embarrassment. She hates that her father can still get a rise out of her.

Her mother is glaring in her father’s direction, but before she can tell him off, Jeannie appears, all angles and bones as she leans out the doorway of her bedroom. “Hey, where are you guys going?” she asks, her tone whiny. “You’re all dressed up. Are you going somewhere cool without me?”

“It’s not cool, Jeannie,” Vicki promises.

“We’ve been invited to dinner by some of our grown-up friends,” Dawn explains.

“Then why is Vicki going?”

Her parents exchange glances. And Vicki, who’s always just a little bit angry, who’s always had a temper to match her red hair, does what she does best: she makes an impulsive decision.

“I’m going because I’m pregnant,” she blurts, “and Mom and Dad want to meet the dad’s family.”

Jeannie frowned, her forehead creasing. “Huh? Vicki… you can’t get pregnant until you’re married.”

“Jesus,” Vicki huffs, “what kinda crap are they teaching you in health class?”

“I didn’t get the permission slip signed for that unit; I only know what Mrs. Brown in Sunday School says.”

Vicki whirls around to glare at her parents. “Seriously? You’re expecting her to get all of her sex ed from _sunday school?”_

Her father flicks the back of her ear, and it doesn’t hurt, but muscle memory makes her flinch. She clenches and unclenches her fists, resisting the urge to run.

“You’re already in trouble, Victoria,” he growls. “Don’t make things worse for yourself. I can take away your phone, too.”

She stares at the floor, her cheeks once again bright red. “I’m sorry, Dad.”

He snorts.

“Alright,” says her mother, “we have to go. Jeannie, be good, I’ll talk to you later. Tom, Vicki, come on.”

Vicki follows her parents out of the trailer, feeling very much like she’s heading for a firing squad.

\---

Judd flops down next to Vicki on the long leather sofa, just within sight of the doorway to the dining room. The adults were still talking, probably still using their stupid fake-polite voices that said _I detest you but I’m such a good person that I can still be nice._ Or maybe they would drop the act, now that their sweet, innocent children had left the room. He snorts. This dinner wouldn’t be happening if he or Vicki were _innocent._

“Hey, Vick,” he says softly. She looks up at him from the other end of the couch, where she’s sitting with her legs tucked under her, scrolling through something on her phone. She appears to be sinking into the leather cushions.

“Hey.”

“I’m sorry,” he mumbles. “About my folks, I mean.” Throughout dinner, his parents had done nothing but make snide comments about the Byrnes, his mother looking at Vicki with condescending sympathy and his father never looking at her at all.

“Eh. I’d better get used to it.”

The flat, matter-of-fact tone of her voice makes Judd feel like he’s been punched in the chest. “No,” he says suddenly, “I mean, it’s not okay. For people to… to judge you. For any of this.”

(He’s not sure if his parents hate her more because she’s pregnant, or because she’s trailer trash. Either way, he feels a burning need to protect her from them.)

“I’m getting what’s coming to me, Judd,” she nearly growls. “I’m a fourteen-year-old whore, and now I’m pregnant. This is life, outside of your…” she looks around. “Rich, privileged, probably-italian-leather snowglobe.”

Judd flinches. “Alright then. I just… I guess I wanted to let you know that I’m here for you.”

Vicki snorts. “You really wanna help? Come to my doctor’s appointment on Thursday. If there’s someone else there Mom won’t try to have it out with me.”

He seizes the offering, though from her voice, she’s being sarcastic. “Thursday. Okay, yeah. I think I will.”

\---

Vicki is bone-tired when she gets home from Judd’s house, but she knows there’s still something she has to do. After the fact, she feels bad about how she’s sprung the news of her pregnancy on her little sister. Jeannie deserves an explanation.

“Hey, J-bug,” she murmurs, quietly knocking on her door, “you up?”

“Yep.” When Vicki opens the door, she sees her little sister lying in bed in her pajamas, a small booklight the only light in the room. 

“Whatcha reading?”

“The Golden Compass.” She tilts her head to look at Vicki. “I bet your daemon would be a lion.”

Vicki has no idea what her sister is talking about, so she shrugs. “Cool.” Moving slowly, she sits on the edge of Jeannie’s bed. “Hey, uh, I know it’s late, but I wanted to talk to you about what I said this evening.”

Jeannie scrunches up her face. “That you’re… pregnant? That you’re having a baby?”

“Yeah.” Vicki nods, swallowing around the lump in her throat. “Um, I don’t want to give you too many details, but… if a girl makes bad decisions, and she’s not careful, she can get pregnant even if she’s not married, or dating someone, or whatever.”

Jeannie’s eyes go wide. “Wait. Can I get pregnant if I don’t brush my teeth or do my chores?”

Vicki laughs, but her sister’s naivety is sobering. “No. No. Um, when you’re a little older I’ll tell you how it really works, but don’t worry, you’re safe.”

“Phew.” Jeannie crawls over the blankets, nestling into Vicki’s side. “So you’re pregnant because you did something you weren’t supposed to?”

“More or less, yeah.” Vicki shrugs. “And I… I don’t really know how I feel about it. But I’m gonna have a baby. So things are gonna get pretty different.”

Jeannie moves her hand to Vicki’s stomach. “Is your belly gonna get big? It feels normal right now.”

“It’ll get bigger soon. It already looks bigger to me when I take off my clothes.”

“Can I see?”

Vicki shakes her head. Like she’d said, she’s tired. “Not right now; it’s time for bed. I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Okay.” Jeannie wraps her in a hug. “Goodnight, Vicki.”

Vicki buries her nose in her sister’s hair. “Goodnight, Jeannie. Love you.”

\---

Judd has to skip Spanish on Thursday for Vicki’s appointment, but the class is dumb and boring, anyway; he’s practically fluent. It’s not even a choice for him, to pick up his backpack and saunter out the door. A square of blank paper and a mumbled, “I gotta go” get him out of class, and then he knows how to get out of school from there. He meets Vicki as she’s walking out the front doors.

“Hey,” she mutters. “Didn’t think you were serious about coming along.”

He shrugs-- after last night, he knows she won’t believe him if he does remind her of his promise. “Just trying to… be here for you, and stuff.”

She nods shortly. “There’s Mom’s car.”

“I, uh…” Judd rubs the back of his neck. The dented Volvo that probably drives the entire Byrne family around makes his truck, this year’s model of F-150, look like a dumb, shiny waste of money. “I’ll follow you guys. Can’t really leave my car at school.”

“You can drive?” Vicki looks surprised.

“Uh-huh. Technically I’m not supposed to, ‘cause I’m grounded, but, I, uh, brought it today.”

Her eyes narrow. “Do your parents know you’re coming with me?”

He licks his lips. “If your mom asks, absolutely.”

Vicki shrugs. “Not like I care.”

With that, she sticks her hands in her sweatshirt pocket and walks away.

\---

It’s different, with Judd here.

Last time, Vicki had been able to hide. She’d been able to avoid her mother. The doctor didn’t expect anything other than plain answers to her questions. But this feels different. She’s too aware of Judd sitting next to her; they’re both silent, but he keeps looking at her, like he wants to speak, but doesn’t know what to say.

“What?” she grumbles.

Judd actually blushes. “Oh, uh, nothing”

Vicki rolls her eyes. She thinks about picking up a magazine, just to make the silence a little more comfortable, but those seem like they’re for older women, married women, women with jobs and money who should actually be parents. Not people like Vicki.

Thankfully, Judd doesn’t try to start any sort of conversation. He, Vicki, and Dawn aren’t in what could be called a comfortable silence, but by the time her name is called, Vicki has managed to rein herself back to a normal level of apathy.

“Welcome back, Vicki,” says her doctor. There are more questions about her symptoms and lifestyle. Apparently her bloodwork looks better, thanks to the iron supplements. Judd and Dawn leave for the physical exam-- the doctor remarks with surprise that Vicki already has a bit of a bump-- and then it’s time for the first ultrasound.

At first, only the doctor can see the screen. She maneuvers the probe for a few seconds, then nods, satisfied. “Good heartbeat, baby seems healthy…”

Vicki catches herself watching her doctor avidly, focusing on her facial expressions. When a crease appears in the doctor’s eyebrows, she feels a pit forming in her stomach.

“Oh, wow,” the doctor murmurs.

That is _not_ what Vicki wants to hear. “What, ‘wow’?”

Her doctor gives her a smile and turns the ultrasound monitor so it’s visible to everyone. “Well, Vicki, here are your babies…”

Vicki stares wide-eyed at the older woman. “Wait, like twins?”

“Uh, Vick,” Judd pipes up from his spot next to her, “it looks like there’s three.”

She slowly turns to look as well, squinting at the tiny gray blobs on the screen.

One…

Two…

Three…

Vicki’s jaw drops.

“Oh, fuck.”


	7. Triplets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vicki and Judd are left reeling after the results of the ultrasound.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Easter! And Claire, welcome back to the internet!

Judd follows the Byrnes back to their house primarily because he’s operating on autopilot, and can’t spare the brain function to find his way home. Add that to the fact that spending time with Vicki is more pleasant than going home to face the consequences of breaking his grounding, and it’s no contest at all.

Vicki’s mother bustles around the house, clearly stressed and irritated. “Victoria, I don’t--” she glares at Judd, but only for a moment, soon continuing on to straighten a stack of books-- “I don’t know what to tell you. We’re not discussing this right now. Why don’t you…” now she really does glare at Judd. “Take your _friend_ around the park. I need some room to breathe.”

“Yeah, whatever,” Vicki grumbles. She waves her arm in a halfhearted beckon, and Judd follows her quickly out of the trailer. For a few minutes, they just walk through the chilly February air, Judd matching Vicki’s brisk pace easily, thanks to his long legs.

“Do you want my coat?” Judd asks. Vicki is only wearing a t-shirt and leggings; she must be cold. 

She sort of scowls at him, but does nod. “Sure.”

“So…” Judd thinks for a minute, trying to make it sink in that they’re going to have _three_ babies. “So, uh… triplets… how are you feeling about that?”

“Pissed,” Vicki snaps. “I wasn’t even gonna be able to handle one baby, the hell am I gonna do with three?” She pushes her tangled red hair out of her face, but the wind blows it back. 

Suddenly, Judd gets an idea for a peace offering. He reaches into his pocket, past his phone, wallet, and things he can’t identify by shape, and pulls a hair tie out from the very depths. “Here, want this?”

“Why the fuck do you have one of those?”

Judd shrugs. “I have a little sister. She’s always losing things, and complaining that it’s because girls’ clothes don’t have pockets. So I put her stuff in my ‘unfairly huge’ pockets.” He puts air quotes around the word, chuckling to himself at the memory of Piper’s indignation.

After a moment, Vicki nods and takes the elastic. “How old’s your sister?”

“Nine,” Judd answers, smiling despite himself. “She’s got a twin brother, too. They’re the craziest kids in the history of ever, but I love ‘em like hell.”

Vicki smiles too, and Judd tries to remember if he’s seen it before. She has a beautiful smile. “I have a little sister, too,” she answers. “Not a twin, so I can definitely blame your genetics for these three.” she lays a hand on her stomach; Judd’s gaze follows the movement. “Jeannie is eleven. She’s the nicest kid you’ll ever meet… I gotta keep her safe until she can get out. Not let this place get to her.”

Judd looks around. Yeah, the trailer park is run down and dreary, but he’s still not sure what exactly Vicki’s talking about. “What do you mean? It looks alright, and the public schools are pretty decent…”

She laughs mirthlessly. “I’m not talking about schools or aesthetics, Judd. Just look at me. I’m a fourteen-year-old who goes out and gets drunk on the weekends, who sleeps with anyone and everyone. It’s a fucking miracle I’m just now getting pregnant.”

“Vicki…” Judd is stricken, sobered by the reminder that their lives are so fucking _different_ and he can’t possibly hope to understand hers. “I’m sorry.”

“No, you aren’t,” she scoffs. “Noone ever is.”

Judd isn’t quite sure what to make of that.

\---

When he gets home, he’s in trouble.

Of course he is. He’d skipped school, which is always a punishable offense, and on top of that, he’s broken the terms of his grounding. Judd is surprised his parents hadn’t come for him earlier. Or had they not noticed the missing car, and only known when the school called?

The second option feels more likely.

“And just where have you been?” Judd Sr. demands, even as Judd is stepping through the door and throwing his backpack into his cubby.

Judd hates that the manners he’s been raised with mean he automatically straightens and meets his father’s gaze. “With Vicki,” he mutters.

“Vicki.” His dad says the name like it’s dirty. “Now you’re _skipping school_ for this girl?”

“Yeah. I’m skipping school to go to her doctors’ appointments.” Judd glares at his dad, well aware of what he thinks of the Byrnes. 

Judd Sr. shakes his head, disgust evident on his face. “Good Lord, Judd, you’re throwing your life away! Skipping school, not listening to your mother and I--”

“He didn’t even hang his bag on the hook!” Phillip pipes up. “He just tossed it into the cubby where it’s gonna make a mess.”

Judd scowls at his brother.

His father sighs in frustration. “Son, this is your last warning. You’re grounded, and if you can’t accept that, we’ll take your phone next.” He folds his arms. “Don’t make me put parental restrictions on it like I do with the twins.”

Even though he knows this is practically a capital offense in this house, Judd rolls his eyes and starts up the stairs. “Sure, whatever. Sorry.”

(He’s not. Not at all.)

\---

Late that night, Judd lies awake. His bed is against the wall between his and his parents’ rooms, and he can hear their conversation clearly; his dad isn’t even trying to be quiet.

“He’s ruining his goddamned life, Christine,” Judd Sr. growls. “The kid’s too young to know what’s good for him… it’s bad enough that he’s following a girl like _that_ around like a lovesick puppy, but he’s gotten her knocked up, too? At least if she weren’t pregnant I’d be confident that she’d vanish as soon as he graduates.”

“She needs our help, honey,” Christine says calmly, placatingly. But even through the wall, Judd can hear the saccharine, condescending tone of her voice. “Judd’s just trying to do the right thing for that poor little scrap of a girl.”

“Yeah, yeah, the right thing.” There’s a few thumping noises; his dad taking off his shoes. “I just don’t see why ‘the right thing’ can’t be giving the slut some money and directing her to a doctor and not having to worry about this again.”

They keep going from there, but Judd rolls over and shoves his head under his pillow, too disgusted to listen. He just doesn’t understand how his parents can talk about Vicki like that, like she’s not even a human being. He knows they have no empathy or understanding of anyone who doesn’t live in a fucking mini-mansion, but this is a new low. 

_How can they claim to be Christian if they don’t have any idea how to treat other people?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gonna go eat more chocolate now


	8. Day at the Park

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vicki breaks a few rules, with some unexpected help.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> good morning! Claire, did this chapter get up before you?

Vicki is tired all the time, now. And the arguments that echo through the trailer at all hours don’t help.

“C’mon, Jeannie,” she mutters as she’s lacing up her dusty yellow converse one afternoon. “I’ll take you to the park.”

“I thought you had to go to work,” Jeannie shoots back, squinting over the edge of her book.

“I do,” Vicki confirms. She’d gotten the job at the thrift store a few weeks ago, and now works Monday and Tuesday afternoons, plus most of Saturday. She’s grateful to get out of the house, but with how stressed, tense, and yell-y her parents have been, she wants Jeannie out, too. “The park is on the way. I’ll drop you off.”

“I’m not allowed to be at the park by myself,” Jeannie reminds her. Vicki groans.

“Do you wanna go someplace without constant arguing, or not?”

“Fine.” Jeannie’s shoulders slump. Vicki doesn’t have time to cheer her up, though; if she’s stopping by the park on the way, she has to leave now or risk being late for work.

“Come on, then,” she says, snapping her fingers as she leaves the room. Jeannie trails behind her, and they all but run out of the trailer.

\---

Judd flicks absentmindedly through his SAT prep book, squinting, thanks to the bright sun. His parents have graciously lifted his grounding… so that he can take Piper and Phillip to the playground.

“Judd!” Piper squeals. “Judd, come push me!”

He shades his eyes as he looks up, finding his sister on the swingset. “You’re nine years old, Pipes. Can’t you pump your legs?”

“Yeah, but I can’t get very high like that,” she whines.

He glares one last time at the systems of equations on the page. “Alright, fine.”

He hasn’t been pushing for ten minutes when he hears an unexpectedly familiar voice.

“Alright, just stay on the playground and wait for me to get back,” Vicki is saying. “Don’t talk to strangers, yada yada yada.”

With her is a younger girl, with matching fiery hair, still clinging to her arm. “Are you sure this is a good idea?”

“Yeah, you’ll be fine,” Vicki insists. “Look around, there’s loads of people here. Nothing’s gonna happen.”

Almost without thinking, Judd ducks underneath Piper, at the height of her arc, and crosses the mulch toward Vicki and her sister. “Hey, Vick!” 

Her head snaps up. “Oh! Hey, Judd.”

The younger girl looks up at him. “Vicki, who is he?”

“He’s a friend of mine, Jeannie. Go play.”

Jeannie folds her arms. “I thought you didn’t have friends.”

Judd notices a blush coloring Vicki’s neck and cheeks. She nudges her sister in the shoulder. “Alright, enough. Have fun on the playground; I have to go.”

“Where are you going?” Judd asks curiously, watching Jeannie run off.

“Work.” Vicki pushes her hair out of her face, and Judd is almost startled by how bright her green eyes look in the sunlight. “Um, hey… look, I don’t ask for favors, but since you’re here… she’s technically not allowed to be on her own unsupervised. Could you just… watch her? Only while you’re here, I mean. I’ll be back in a few hours. But you don’t, uh, have to wait or anything.”

He nods quickly; too quickly. Now he’s trying not to blush. “Sure, sure. I’m watching the twins anyway. I’ll see you when you get back.”

Vicki shrugs, but her lips quirk upwards. “Thanks.”

\---

Work is just about the only thing Vicki likes about her life at the moment. Mrs. Langley is a nice old woman, wanting to know all about how school is going and what sort of books Vicki likes and anything and everything else. She sits behind the counter and works the register while Vicki organizes the crowded thrift store and greets the occasional customer.

She hasn’t told Mrs. Langley she’s pregnant yet. She has a feeling that will change what the woman thinks of her.

At the moment, though, her shift passes by quickly and pleasantly. The sun is setting as she leaves, hurrying back to the playground. She’s probably going to be in a hell of a lot of trouble for taking Jeannie out, but it’s better than leaving her at home.

To her surprise, the playground isn’t completely empty when she arrives. Jeannie is see-sawing with a younger girl, and there’s a little boy playing in the playhouse. Sitting on the metal bench near the side is…

“Judd! Jesus, what are you still doing here?”

He shrugs, totally fucking _nonchalant._ “Not like I have anything better to do. Figured I could stay until you got back.”

She’s suddenly, irrationally angry. “Yeah, you’re just Mr. Perfect, huh?” She glares at him. “I can take care of my own sister.”

“I know?” Judd looks confused. “I just thought… I mean, any way I can help you, I’ll do it…”

Vicki shakes her head. “I… thanks. You just… you don’t need to get yourself any more tangles up in my shit than you already are.”

Heaving a sigh, she takes Jeannie’s hand and walks away.

\---

Dinner tonight is even more awkward than usual. The silence is heavy, smothering the Byrne family as they all dine on a meal of beans and rice. Jeannie only picks at her food-- it’s the third time they’ve had it this week-- but Vicki is so hungry that she wolfs it down.

“Victoria, don’t shovel,” her mother reprimands halfheartedly.

Vicki scowls. “I’m _hungry,_ Mom. I’m eating for four.”

There’s a clattering noise as Jeannie drops her fork. “Wait, _four?”_

Somehow, in the stress of the last week, nobody has told the youngest Byrne exactly how many babies Vicki is having.

“Yeah. I’m having triplets, J.”

Jeannie’s eyes bug out of her head. “Triplets!?!? Really?”

“Mhm.” Vicki stuffs as much food as she can fit on her fork into her mouth. Her father gives her a look, but she glances away.

Even as Jeannie keeps rambling about triplets, Vicki is waiting for the other shoe to drop. Surely her parents had noticed Jeannie’s absence sometime this afternoon. When will they bring it up? And how the hell will they punish her more than they already are?

She just hopes they don’t punish Jeannie.

Somehow, they make it through dinner without mention of the afternoon excursion. Jeannie skips off to read her book. Her dad goes out for a smoke, though he swears he’s going to quit. Vicki and her mother wash the dishes.

It’s only when she’s lying in bed in the dark that Vicki believes she’s not going to get in trouble. Tonight, the notion doesn’t bring her comfort.

_They say they’ve changed, but they still don’t care at all._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Vicki's parents just fucking suck


	9. Chapter Nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> starring Bruce (kinda)

By her twelfth week, Vicki is undeniably, visibly pregnant. She can’t hide it anymore, no matter how many sweatshirts and coats she wears. At school, she can skip class, and hide under the shroud of anonymity. But every other Friday night is Youth Group. God, Vicki hates youth group.

“Mom,” she groans, “do I really have to go? Come on, let me skip. Just tonight.”

“Absolutely not.” Dawn sets her hands on her hips and aims a glare at her daughter. “This is part of the deal, remember? You go to every youth group meeting until those babies are born.”

Vicki groans again, louder, but doesn’t keep arguing. She knows her arguments will fall on deaf ears. _They’ll judge me,_ she could say. _Stare at me the whole time. Act even worse than they already do._

Yes, she could say any of that. But all she would get from her mom would be _you deserve it._

\---

Judd’s knee bounces as he sits in the scratchy armchair, lemonade and brownies forgotten on the table in front of him. Youth Group is supposed to start within the next few minutes, and Vicki still isn’t here. She’s always here early, just like him. Thanks to her sudden change in routine, Judd had found himself trapped in conversation with Bruce, their youth pastor. At least Bruce had only made small talk about school.

“Alright, guys,” Bruce calls, clapping his hands together. “It’s time to get started.”

Judd frowns. Usually he stays quiet and keeps his head down at youth group, but tonight he finds himself speaking before he knows he’s doing so. “Vicki’s not here yet.”

“Huh.” Bruce looks around, confirming this fact for himself. “Well, hopefully she’ll be here soon. Let’s start by going around and talking about what everyone’s got going on this week.”

One girl his age starts chattering about SATs and winter sports, but Judd stops listening. He never listens; never pays any attention. Usually he passes the time by staring at Vicki, but tonight he can only stare at the door. And then, within the next few minutes-- before it’s his turn to recount his week, thankfully-- the group is interrupted.

“Hey,” Vicki mutters, briefly looking at Bruce. “Sorry I’m late.”

Bruce brushes off the apology, but Judd and, indeed, the rest of the group, are focused on something much different.

Underneath Vicki’s thin hoodie is her clearly visible baby bump.

Judd looks around, trying to gauge if everyone has noticed, or if he only sees it because he knows she’s pregnant already. But no, everyone is looking right at her. He sees Lionel looking down at his feet, one of the few with enough manners not to stare.

_Shit._

“Vicki,” Bruce says, clearly trying to break the silence in the room, “have a seat. We’re just talking about what we’ve done since we last met… would you like to speak?”

Vicki flops into the chair on Judd’s left. “No.”

“Well,” Bruce sighs, “we’re going around the circle, and you’re next.”

Judd sees Vicki’s eyes dart around the room as if she’s looking for a different seat, but she stays where she is. “What did I do last week? Well, uh…” suddenly, she huffs and folds her arms over her chest. “Oh, fuck it. I went to the doctor, because, duh, I’m pregnant. And I found out I’m having triplets. So yeah, go ahead, keep staring at me like I’m an alien. I totally have no problem with that.”

Her tone is aggressive sarcasm, but the way she hunches and shrinks back in her chair gives Judd and irrational urge to protect her. The harsh stares from around the room don’t help. Feeling anger bubbling in his chest, he closes his eyes and counts to ten.

“Watch your language, please, Vicki,” Bruce says, after a beat. “And, um… are things going well for you?”

She snorts. “No.”

“Well, you’re in our thoughts and prayers.”

Judd squeezes his eyes more tightly shut, his fists clenching. _She’ll be in everyone’s thoughts, alright. But what the hell are prayers going to do?_

\---

At the last youth group meeting, Vicki had thought that analyzing Christianity in literature was probably part of one of Dante’s circles of hell. After tonight, she’s decided the actual analysis barely counts as purgatory,

Being stared at and whispered about by her peers with nothing but old books to distract her, however, is definitely hell.

She suffers through the whole meeting with her face bright red, She keeps her eyes down, trying to ignore the voices around her. _God, if this is youth group, school is gonna fucking suck._

Once Bruce dismisses them all, Vicki rushes for the door. To her dismay, he calls out for her to stay back.

“Hey, Vicki,” he says, in his soft, gentle, you can-trust-me voice. He clearly is going to say more, but he looks up and frowns at something behind her. “Judd, you can go home.”

“No.” As Vicki turns around, Judd steps into the room, his jaw visibly tight and his shoulders squared as if he’s preparing himself for a fight. “I’m, uh, I mean--” he looks nervously at her; she raises an eyebrow. “I’m, uh… helping Vicki?” He clearly doesn’t know what to say, how much to tell Bruce. Vicki almost laughs at his awkwardness.

Somehow, their youth pastor get s the point anyway. “You’re the…” he waves his pen in the direction of Vicki’s baby bump-- “father.”

“Uh, yeah.” Judd shoves his hands into his pockets. “So, um, we’re kinda… doing this together.”

For the first time, Judd’s habit of trying to “help” and just generally being there doesn’t spark any sort of anger in Vicki. She sees embarrassment in his posture and shame, maybe guilt, in his eyes. Fuck, they’re two sides of the same coin, aren’t they?

She’s almost forgotten Bruce is in the room, but he’s the next to speak. “You’re good kids.”

Vicki snorts. “Tell that to my parents.”

Bruce gives her an almost forlorn smile. “Anyone can have a stroke of bad luck. But not everyone has the strength, the bravery to keep going with it.” He looks from her to Judd and back. “Good luck, you two. And let me know if you need anything, okay? Either of you.”

Vicki looks away; Judd looks at the ground.

“Thanks,” they mutter, accidentally in unison.

Bruce chuckles. “Well, have a good night.”

Unintentionally side by side, Vicki and Judd head out into the dark parking lot.


	10. Chapter 10

“I don’t like him, Dawn,” Vicki’s father grumbles, providing opinions from behind his morning paper. “I don’t like the kid, I don’t like his family. What kind of son of a gun knocks up a fourteen-year-old?”

Her mother sighs. “At least he’s… sticking around. Trying to help her.”

Tom mutters under his breath about what Judd is probably trying to do. Vicki, not a part of the conversation despite being in the same room, only rolls her eyes.

After youth group, she’s come to the conclusion that Judd is probably a decent person, at least. So naturally, her parents have taken a break from worrying about triplets to complain about how little they like him.

Of course, she has no desire to be a part of this argument, but it makes her think. _He’s clearly serious about sticking around, at least right now. But things are only gonna get harder. Does he work at all? Does he understand what it’s gonna mean, to have three kids while we’re still in high school?_ She briefly considers the ultimately horrible night their families had met. _Does he realize how much he could lose?_

Her parents’ argument gets louder, and she groans and leaves the kitchen. Today is one of those days when the trailer is too small, when she paces like a caged tiger. In days past, she would’ve gone out and found a dealer, or maybe a guy to pass the time with. Now, she finds herself faceplanting on her bed, a hand over her stomach.

_God, fuck this. Fuck my shitty parents. Fuck stressing over school and life and babies. Fuck Judd Thompson, for being un-hate-able. Doesn’t he know I need to blame someone?_

The only person to blame, Vicki knows, is herself.

\---

Judd has reached the point where he actually does the reading for his science classes now, pulling out the thick textbook he’d received at the beginning of the year. That’s how bored he is, with his parents cracking down on the terms of his grounding. Only, it’s hard to focus on air pollution when he can hear every word of their private “marital debates”.

He’s always hated hearing his parents argue. Usually, when the argue about him, it leaves him with a ball of guilt and self-loathing in the pit of his stomach. But nowadays, he’s only a part of their most common debate: What to Do About Vicki.

“I’m just saying, I sympathize with her,” his mother says. She’s the hardest to hear through the wall; more often than not, she speaks at a normal volume.

“Christine, she’s a slut. A high school freshman at one of _those_ parties, doing the kinda shit that gets her pregnant? She only got what was coming, if you ask me. Hell, what’s to say the kid is even Judd’s?”

Judd feels his pencil snap in his suddenly clenched fist. He _trusts_ Vicki. He _believes_ her. If she says he’s the dad, then he is, and nothing about her behavior or habits will change how he feels about that.

As of right now, that mostly amounts to scared, nervous, and… hopeful?

If he’s really going to do this, and if Vicki will let him, he’s going to spend the rest of his life with her and their kids. Three kids, before he’s even a high school senior. It’s absolutely insane… but somehow, he doesn’t think he’ll mind a life with them. With _her._

“She’s gonna ruin his goddamn life!” his dad shouts. But Judd just shakes his head and turns the page in his textbook. As far as he’s concerned, Vicki isn’t ruining his life… she’s saving it.

\---

Vicki has discovered a loophole in her grounding: a few times a week, when she’s not working or doing homework, her parents let her take Jeannie to the playground. It’s not so bad, sitting on the bench in the spring sunlight. And surprisingly enough, more often than not, she sees a familiar face.

“Hey, Vick,” Judd greets, sitting next to her. “Just took Piper and Phillip for mini-tacos. We ended up with extra. Want one?”

Vicki narrows her eyes, but she is definitely hungry. “Thanks,” she murmurs, taking the steak carnitas taco from him.

“How’s everything going?” Judd asks. “I know… I know youth group was rough last week. Is the same stuff happening at school yet?”

Vicki shrugs. “If it is, I can’t tell. I think people just generally care less during school. But they’ll all find out eventually.”

“Well…” Judd reaches out, laying a hand on her arm. Vicki tenses but doesn’t pull away; Judd must feel it, though, because he turns red. “Well, um, just let me know, okay? If you need someone in your corner. I’m here for you.”

She nods slowly, turning the statement over in her head. He says it so often, so earnestly, that she’s actually starting to believe him… but she’s been burned too often in her life. She physically can’t take him up on it yet.

“Thanks,” she sighs, trying to give him a smile. “I’ll, uh, keep you posted.” She faces the playground once more, silent for a bit. Jeannie is climbing up to the slide. Judd’s younger siblings are on the see-saw together. She turns a bit, looking at him out of the corner of her eye. “They’re twins, right?”

“Yep.” He pops the ‘p’. Sometimes they hate each other. Sometimes they won’t leave the room without each other. It’s a mess.” He turns to look at her. “I wonder what ours will be like.”

_Ours._ Vicki lays a hand on her stomach, unexpectedly warmed by the simple statement. “I hope they get along,” she murmurs. “Raising three kids in a trailer will be hard enough as is.”

Judd is quiet for a long moment. As she watches, he licks his lips, looks away, opens his mouth, then closes it. “Well, uh, you don’t have to,” he says at last.

Vicki squints at him. “Yeah, like your folks would let me set foot in their McMansion.”

He nods shortly in agreement. “Vick, I just want you to know… I’m not exactly in the habit of listening to my parents.”

She nods slowly, taking it in. She finds herself curious about Judd Thomspon, despite herself. Without speaking, she watches him for a while.

_Who are you, Mr. Nice Guy? Just how far will you really go for me?_

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading! if you liked it, leave a comment or kudos, or come find me at nursebarbarahereward on tumblr!


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